Saturday, July 22, 2006

Dwight Yoakam ‘Guitars, Cadillacs, Etc., Etc.’



I meant to post this one last Thursday, July 20th... But I forgot to bring the floppy disc to work with me. And no, I didn't attend the show at The Garage Friday night.

Sometimes, you can find the funniest things in the Greensboro News & Record. And this morning, I got a real sick rib tickler….

It happened in Morganton, North Carolina and the more I read, the harder I laughed. Sure, it’s a tragic thing when someone accidentally kills the love of his or her life, but it’s the weirdness that makes it comedic gold.

A legally blind man fatally shot his wife as he tried balancing a plate of fried chicken and a pistol.

Yes, it sounds funny right off the bat.

This cat found a .38 caliber pistol in a box and decided to show it to his wife as she was handing him a plate of fried chicken. He accidentally shot her in the head. And in case you’re still not laughing, he is wheel chair bound.

Investigators have filed no charges, but I’m going out on a limb here… He will never eat fried chicken again.

Let this be a lesson to all of us… Fried chicken, wheel chairs, legal blindness, marriage, and firearms do not mix.

For some reason, I’ve had a hankering to see a movie at the Eden Drive-In. I’m itching to get my truck parked in the back with a couple of lawn loungers and a cooler of adult beverages between them. Then just kick back and watch a triple feature into the wee hours of the morning.

To me, there’s something romantic and Americana about drive-in movies. I remember when my parents would get my sisters and me dressed in pajamas and hit the drive-in that used to be on Highway 29. I remember seeing one of those “Flubber” flicks on the big screen. I can’t remember which one, but there’s a scene where basketball players were bouncing all over the place. I also remember seeing The Birds there too when my parents thought that I was asleep.

The Cell and What Lies Beneath were the last films I saw at the Eden Drive-In. I took my hateful and constantly displeasured ex-fiancée where she proceeded to bitch and bitch. She didn’t like the heat, she didn’t like the Drive-In, she didn’t like the oldies playing on boxes and P.A., and she didn’t like my romantic attitude about drive-ins. The only thing that she did like was the snack bar where they had cookies n’ cream ice cream.

She and I never went to a drive-in movie again.

I’ve always loved them and the idea of watching a movie in your car. And I’ve never really understood why people don’t go anymore.

Oh well…

Money has been a little tight these last couple of weeks and to top it off, the taxes on Roxy (my truck) are due at the end of the month. So it looks as if I’m going to put off going to the drive-in. And I just got off the phone with Kim Thore who reminded me about the Vagabond Society’s Tom Petty show at The Garage in Winston-Salem Friday night. So I’m thinking about hitting that show without the benefit of adult beverages.

Damn.

9 comments:

  1. Ahhhhhhhhhhh! Mentions of Dwight Yoakam and Tom Petty in the same post. *swoon*
    (My two favorites).

    I wanted to get a sitter and go to that show at the garage, but it didn't happen. :(

    The real Tom and the Heartbreakers are coming back to NC on September 10. I asked hubby whether he'd be willing to go see him again (we went on June 9 to Charlotte for the tour opener), or if he wanted me to go alone. He didn't answer. I'm planning to buy a single from the fan club presale next week. I. AM. GOING. COMMA. DAMMIT.

    I desperately miss the drive-in that used to be in Walkertown. It was one of our favorite summer activities. Lawn chairs, a cooler, a picnic dinner, and a movie. What could be better? The ex fiancee must have been nuts not to love it.

    In other news, I've taken to trying to pronounce your anti-spam word verifications when I post. Today's word: vqcaxxl. Apparently, I'm easily amused.

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  2. I also loved the one in Walkertown. That one, I visited with a different girlfriend. It was Allyson for those of you at home keeping score.

    Yes, you are easily amused. I think that's why you think I'm funny.

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  3. So... you need to get a new girlfriend and take her to the drive-in that's in Mount Airy, if it's one chick per drive-in.

    I think that the one in Greensboro off of Randleman Road used to show porn. It was gone by the time I was a teen, though. I'm not sure why I remember that.

    Word of the day: tiith. (I think this spam blocker word changes with every post/comment. Otherwise, I wouldn't post it).

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  4. Christine9:52 PM

    I'm not sure exactly what year the drive-in on Randleman Rd. closed down, but I remember seeing a movie there when I was 15 (1982/83). Well, maybe "seeing" is too strong a word. A movie was playing while a bunch of us sat in the car drinking beer and playing strip poker.

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  5. Yeah, I don't think it was always porn. My younger brother went there to see a movie when he was about the same age as you.

    I missed the drive-in fun there. I was over at the old Jefferson Pilot location off of High Point Road, drinking Boone's Farm and playing with boys.

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  6. Bebo... Know anyone in the running to be my new girlfriend? I sure as hell don't.

    I've always wanted to investigate the Bel-Air in Mt. Airy. And it's right down the road from a Long John Silver's.

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  7. Christine drinking beer? Playing strip poker?? Where the hell were you when I was growing up?

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  8. I do remember a drive-in in Colfax or Kernersville that showed porn. Although I never went, some of my school chums hit it.

    I always thought that it would be interesting to be on a plane landing or taking off at the airport. From the air, I'm sure they could see something carnal going on.

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  9. Unfortunately, I don't have anyone in mind who is Eugene-worthy. I need to get my brother married off, too.

    I don't know about any K'ville or Colfax drive-ins. It was before my residency here in K-vegas, apparently.

    Of course, I've never seen porn... in a theatre.

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