Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Vinnie Vincent Invasion

I just got word last night about the cancellation of Fox’s 24. I wasn’t completely surprised and to be quite honest, I’m glad to see it go. 24 had a good run and managed to milk the fears of terrorism from Americans as well as providing some good ol’ entertainment.

The show constantly had subplots with little or nothing to do with the main plot. Those subplots were more or less used to thrust little thorns into Jack Bauer’s, the main character, side. If it’s not Bauer’s daughter Kim getting into some kind of trouble, it was someone at CTU leading a dangerous double life that lead to betraying the American people. Those little subplots became predictable and downright unnecessary.

I mean seriously, what was wrong with the main plot as a source of storytelling?

But conflict between characters has always been more or less a blueprint to keep a show popular. After all, look at soap operas. Those characters are always in conflict with one another. And have you ever noticed a television in any soap character’s home?

Perhaps that’s why they have too much time on their hands allowing them to screw around with the other characters, but I digress.

24 has given us all kinds of good entertainment. Especially to those of us that enjoy things blowing up or weapon play. Who could ever forget poor, stupid Kim Bauer running from trouble with her more than ample bosom flopping back and forth?

We had two full seasons of that boob swaying action!

And what about the lame ankle break character Tony Almaidea suffered on his way to an interrogation room?

Since the actor broke his leg, they had to write that into the show. But a trip and fall in a level hallway?


What about my theory of the right wing conservatives at Fox influencing the American public how to vote in Presidential elections?

They showed us a strong black President with some light right-wing attitudes and the public eventually followed by electing Obama. They presented an older sneaky, spineless President and the public voted against McCain.

The current 24 President is a woman and she’s my favorite. Not because she’s hot or anything like that… It’s because they are painting her up to be a little dumber than the males that preceded her. She’s constantly asking questions and therefore it gives the perception that women aren't as smart as men in the political arena.

It’s practically become a drinking game for me. Whenever Madame President asks a question, take a shot. It won’t be long before you’ll pass out and then wake up during a late night infomercial.

Just last night, Madame President asked 13 questions all within 5 minutes of screen time. Simply amazing!

Because of their influence, there’s very little chance that we’ll elect Palin or any other woman into the White House for the next three elections. But, we shall see.

We also learned some good things by watching 24… Like how to tear out someone’s stomach lining with a towel and a little water.

After asking a question without receiving and answer, yell the same query as vein-poppingly loud as you can to gain the knowledge you seek. That always works for Bauer.

The character of Kim Bauer always got on my nerves despite her two biggest assets on the show. But the character that I disliked the most was Chloe O’Brien.

She may have gotten Jack out of a lot of trouble. She may have stood by him through thick and thin, but I just couldn’t stand her bitching and complaining. I was hoping that the new leader of CTU, the guy who played “Bubba” in Forest Gump, would knock her damn head off. Chloe is always sullen and grumpy, much like a teenage girl. She just got on my nerves even without all the Goth-rock.

And what about that lame filler movie where Jack Bauer was in Africa hanging out with boys?

All in all, 24 was a good ride that took me two seasons before I got on board. It will be missed.

Feel free to give us your thoughts on 24 by using the comments.

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